Friday Fictioneers: “Every Friday authors from around the world gather here to share their 100-words and offer constructive crit and encouragement to each other. “

While I was outside, I heard my name. I didn’t care, not while I was being stared at… Because I knew they were watching me.
“Shut up.”
“What? Noel, ignore them. Here, this will make you feel better. ”
I didn’t want to, but it didn’t matter. That woman made me take those damn pills anyways. I’ve only been here a week, but that didn’t matter either, I knew they’d find me.
And that night in my room, they did. The light came from the balcony this time, so bright it almost blinded me. I knew I wouldn’t be there the next morning.
What the Hell!?? Where is she going!? Where are they taking her!? Is it even a she!? Very good writing, I love your stories.
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It’s a he, Andrea. lol The female version of that name is Noelle.
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Nice work – is he actually seeing ‘others/them’ or is he truly disturbed… who knows! Well done.
KT
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Thank you! I would’ve made it clear, but you know, the 100 words limit.
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Don’t get me wrong – I like the doubt here, it makes you think about the piece and leaves you wondering. Not knowing if he is haunted or delusional works.
🙂
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Oh ok, awesome. lol Sorry for ruining it then.
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The tense in the last sentence is either wrong or she is no longer there. I’m a little confused?? Other than that, excellent!!
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You are completely right! Thanks a lot for catching that, I overlooked it.
Already fixed it.
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No problem. It happens to many of us.
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Full of beautiful paranoia (or is he right?!), this gets me right into Noel’s brain. The last sentence doesn’t fit though – is the change of tense deliberate? If it’s past tense, he already isn’t (wasn’t) there…
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Thanks a lot! (We’ll never know.(?) )
Honestly I’ve struggling with that last sentence. lol I think I got it right this time.
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I liked the ambiguity of this piece. Well done.
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Thank you!
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I am sensing a little bit of Stephen King’s Tommyknockers in this…veeeeery much so. o.o
Nice work!
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Never read it, but I love Stephen King and his style, so I’m guessing it’s a compliment and gonna say thank you! Haha
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Great story! I love the ambiguity as to whether he’s just disturbed or whether he really is being visited / abducted. 🙂
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Thank you! I’m glad you liked it.
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Very cool. Alien abduction imminent, or does he require more pills and therapy? Nice to be left guessing 🙂
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That’s the question indeed. 😉 Haha Glad you liked it!
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This one really hooked me in and got me thinking. Ambiguous but intriguing.
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Thank you! I’m glad you liked it.
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Querida Denisse,
Bien venidos a Friday Fictioneers.
Your story is haunting and mysterious. Nicely done.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Thank you so much, Rochelle!
I’m glad you like it, I’m looking forward to next week’s!
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A glimpse inside the thoughts of a deluded / haunted / about to be abducted man. Gripping whichever way you take it, because your character is so strongly portrayed.
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I really appreciate you thinking that, means a lot!
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